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Here is a Halloween fic I wrote for my friend ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
merfilly's Halloween fic- athon...Sam and the team are up to no good again...heh..
Title: Halloween Hijinks AKA Rodney gets Punk'd
Author: elfcat255
Pairing: Sam/Janet---with other team members
Rating: G
Spoilers: None
Warnings: None
Note: my version of SG season 10 world as written about in my fic "Busted"
Note: thanks to my friendcaffinate_me for the idea for this one..heh
Janet sat behind her desk finishing the mountain of paperwork that seemed to be an everyday part of Air Force life. She put off doing most of the important papers until close to the end of shift, because she found it an easy way to wind down from the day. Arranging the stacks in neat piles, she began to stand up when she heard the tinkling sound of a bell. Plopping back down she let her head fall with a thud on the desktop.
“I know I swore an oath to heal not harm but if he rings that bell one more damn time I’m breaking it…or him,” she muttered.
The Daedalus was in dock for a re-fit and some of the Atlantis base personnel were using the opportunity to visit home, Rodney McKay being one of them. A freak accident landed him in Janet’s infirmary. Well they were calling it a freak accident…Janet thought whoever dropped the heavy machinery on Rodney’s foot did it on purpose and so did Rodney. Whoever caused it did a good job, breaking the bones in the scientist’s foot so badly Janet had to install several pins. This was why he was camped out in her infirmary.
The bell rang once more, sighing heavily Janet rose to see what the man wanted; her staff was already avoiding interacting with him while she was around. They learned the hard way he was a very difficult patient, even worse than Jack O’Neill they claimed.
Janet walked out of her office and over to the corner bed that was screened off to transform it into a mini room. Rodney insisted upon having a TV so he could watch his collection of DVDs. There were also two laptop computers set up on either side of him, so he could perfect the many theories he claimed, along with a mini fridge for his snacks.
Walking over to the bed she stood arms crossed, “What do you need now Rodney?”
“Ah…Dr Fraiser…just the person I needed to see,” replied Rodney.
Janet waited, ‘What in the world could he want?’ she thought.
“I need for you to pass a message on to Colonel Carter, tell her I’ve discovered a flaw in her latest calculations on the use of naquada to recharge the ZPM’s,” he said, pronouncing the z as zed, “oh and I need some more snacks for my fridge.”
Janet sighed, “Rodney, I’ll let the colonel know about your new information but I refuse to play your gopher for anything else.”
“Well, without my snacks I’ll get hypoglycemic,” he whined.
“Good thing you’re in the infirmary then,“ Janet quipped as she turned to leave the man to figure out another way to get his snacks.
Janet went back to her office, removing her lab coat she grabbed her purse and jacket, it was time to track down Sam and see what plans they were making for dinner. Leaving the infirmary, she walked into the elevator and rode it down to the lab levels. Upon reaching Sam’s lab, she discovered the door closed and a note with her name on it. Pulling the taped note down she read…Hey Jan…I’m in the commissary with Cam and Vala…meet me there.
Crumpling the note up she turned to go back to the elevator, going back up a few levels she exited and soon walked into the commissary where she saw Sam sitting at a table in the corner with Cameron and Vala, the three were clustered close together as if they were discussing something they didn’t want to be overheard.
Janet walked up and letting her purse fall with a thud on the table she said, “What ever you’re planning…I want in on it.”
Three innocent faces turned to look at her; well Vala was looking not so innocent being unable to hide her grin.
“I have no clue what you’re talking about Janet, “ Sam said nonchalantly.
“Me neither Doc,” Cameron’s replied.
Vala just grinned wider.
“Oh come on,” Janet said as she sat down, “it’s two days before Halloween and Rodney McKay is on Earth; I know you two…” she pointed at Sam and Cam, “are planning another prank. Samantha Carter I know you to well …don’t try and fool me.”
Sam sighed, Cameron gave her a look and shook his head…no. She kicked him under the table and glared back at him. As he was rubbing his kicked shin Sam began speaking.
“Alright…we are planning another prank on him,” she admitted to her partner, “Why do you want to be in on it?”
“Because…he’s been in my infirmary for four days and has alienated every member of my staff; not to mention treating me like errand boy. I’m surprised someone on Atlantis hasn’t caused him physical harm before this. I can see why you’ve been avoiding the infirmary now Sam. That man is infuriating and he stepped on my last nerve today,” Janet informed the group.
Sam rubbed her hand up and down Janet’s back, “Sorry I haven’t been by to see you, but every time I get around him I swear my blood pressure sky rockets and I just want to twist his head off. I mean come on, I’m smart but I don’t rub it in people’s faces like he does,” she said to her partner.
“Believe me if you acted anything like him, you’d be a single woman in a heartbeat, “ Janet replied grinning.
Sam crinkled her nose and stuck out her tongue in reply to Janet’s grin.
“So…what’s the plan folks?” asked Janet
“Well…since you’re going to be helping this will go a whole lot smoother now,” Cameron commented as he began to outline their idea.
The four conspirators moved in closer together as he explained the prank; occasionally Sam or Vala would throw in another twist while Janet listened trying not to laugh.
*****************
Two days later, All Hallows Eve was upon them. The four met in Sam’s lab to go over everything one more time.
“Okay…Janet…Vala…you’re in charge of readying the package, while Cam and myself will be delivering it,” Sam said grinning, “We’ll give you a call on the radio when we’re ready to transport.”
“What if we finish before you’re ready?” asked Vala.
“Well that’s why having Janet help was so great, the sedative she’s going to give should keep him out for several hours…right?” Sam said looking at Janet.
“Oh yeah…he’ll sleep like a baby with a full tummy,” Janet assured her with a grin.
“Okay team…Operation Punk McKay is a go,” Cam said laughing and they all left to carry out the prank.
The infirmary was empty except for Rodney; there were advantages to being CMO after all, having made sure her staff was busy elsewhere. Janet and Vala walked into the infirmary, Vala making a beeline for Rodney’s corner; Janet heading for dispensary. While Vala made small talk with the scientist, Janet readied the sedative. Once the shot was ready, she walked over to the corner.
“Why yes…it was me that discovered a way to save Teal’c from being trapped in the wormhole stream,” commented Rodney as Janet walked up.
Janet held her tongue; it was Sam who discovered a way to rescue Teal’c, not this idiot. While Rodney babbled on with Vala just smiling and oohing at his comments Janet added the sedative into the IV controlling his meds.
“What was that?” he asked when noticing her actions.
“Oh just some antibiotics, don’t want any secondary infections happening now do we,” commented Janet.
“Oh… okay,” he replied and continued with his tall tale.
Vala mouthed…”How long?”, when Rodney wasn’t looking.
Janet stood behind the man, holding up five fingers she counted down, five…four...three...two...one; when she reached one Rodney suddenly went silent, his eyes glassed over and he fell back into the bed.
“Wow…that was fast,” Vala said with grin. Hopping up she ran to Janet’s office to get the supplies they needed. Returning she set the items on a nearby table and began helping Janet to strip the clothing from the victim.
“Are you sure that stuff will wash off?” Janet asked as Vala began lathering on the liquid.
“Oh quite sure, I tested it on Daniel before he left for that conference,” she remarked with a smile, “it’s even edible…see,” she dipped a finger in the container bringing it up for Janet to taste.
“Oh… that’s good; you’re going to have to tell me where you found this, “ Janet replied grinning.
The two women giggled at each other and then began finishing their part of the prank.
Meanwhile, Sam and Cameron were busy sneaking aboard the Daedalus. Sure, they just could have walked right on board, but where was the fun in that. Sam made sure their entrance into the docking area wouldn’t show up in the security logs by hacking into the base computer. Once in they debated on whether or not to zat the guards but then decided that was going overboard. Therefore, they stood behind some cargo crates throwing pebbles picked up from outside at the distant wall. The pebbles made resounding clangs in the docking bay causing the guards to venture over to discover the cause. When this happened, they snuck aboard.
Not exactly sure if all personnel where gone they carefully made their way to the bridge. While Cam kept a watch out for any crew, Sam began entering information into the transport console.
“Okay I’ve located his transponder in the infirmary…now, what are the co-ordinates for his destination?” she asked Cam as he came to stand next to her.
Pulling out a piece of paper he handed it to her, “This is what my buddy sent me; I made sure he plotted it out just right. Don’t want Rodney to end up in a tree or something; this should put him smack in the middle of a clearing,” he assured her.
Sam typed in the destination, “Alright…we’re ready on this end, call and see if they have the package ready,” she said with a giggle.
“Mama Bear this is Pappa Bear do you read me?” Cam said keying his radio.
“Mama Bear here Pappa Bear…over,” came the tinny reply on the radio.
“Is the package ready for delivery…over,” he asked.
“Package ready and waiting Pappa Bear…tell Goldilocks transport when ready…over,” was the response.
Sam nodded and Cam said, “Transporting the package now…stand clear Mamma Bear…over.”
“Mama Bear and Baby Bear clear…over” the voice said.
Sam pushed several buttons activating the console, a moment later she checked for the transponder signal; finding it in the exact spot given to her by Cam, she gave him a thumbs up.
“Pappa Bear to Mama Bear and Baby Bear…the package is delivered…standby for arrivals… over,” Cam said into the radio.
“Coast is clear, awaiting your arrival…Mama Bear over and out,” the voice on the other radio said.
Sam quickly entered new co-ordinates, while also making sure the logs wouldn’t show the activity after they left. Walking away from the console she and Cameron waited in the front area of the bridge where they were enveloped in the transport beam, disappearing they reappeared in the SGC infirmary.
“Everything go smooth on this end?” Sam asked.
“Smooth as glass,” Janet remarked, “they shouldn’t even know he’s missing since my staff refuses to go near his bed.”
“Well all that’s left to do now is wait,” Vala commented.
“Ladies how about I treat you to a nice steak dinner,” Cam said with a big smile on his face.
“That sounds perfect,” replied Sam.
The four pranksters walked out of the infirmary, heading out to enjoy the rest of the evening.
********************
The next day during the morning briefing, the four acted as usual. Janet was in the middle of giving General Landry updates on injured personnel when Walter came into the room. He walked over to the General, leaning down he whispered something in Landry’s ear.
“Excuse me folks, I have to take an important phone call,” Landry said as he rose and disappeared into his office.
Looks were shared as he left the table; they all were trying very hard to keep straight faces as he soon reappeared in his office door.
“Okay…does somebody want to explain to me how Rodney McKay ended up in the middle of a orange tree grove in Florida…naked, painted blue and orange with a sign saying Go Gators attached to his chest?” Landry asked.
No one said a word.
merfilly's Halloween fic- athon...Sam and the team are up to no good again...heh..Title: Halloween Hijinks AKA Rodney gets Punk'd
Author: elfcat255
Pairing: Sam/Janet---with other team members
Rating: G
Spoilers: None
Warnings: None
Note: my version of SG season 10 world as written about in my fic "Busted"
Note: thanks to my friend
caffinate_me for the idea for this one..hehJanet sat behind her desk finishing the mountain of paperwork that seemed to be an everyday part of Air Force life. She put off doing most of the important papers until close to the end of shift, because she found it an easy way to wind down from the day. Arranging the stacks in neat piles, she began to stand up when she heard the tinkling sound of a bell. Plopping back down she let her head fall with a thud on the desktop.
“I know I swore an oath to heal not harm but if he rings that bell one more damn time I’m breaking it…or him,” she muttered.
The Daedalus was in dock for a re-fit and some of the Atlantis base personnel were using the opportunity to visit home, Rodney McKay being one of them. A freak accident landed him in Janet’s infirmary. Well they were calling it a freak accident…Janet thought whoever dropped the heavy machinery on Rodney’s foot did it on purpose and so did Rodney. Whoever caused it did a good job, breaking the bones in the scientist’s foot so badly Janet had to install several pins. This was why he was camped out in her infirmary.
The bell rang once more, sighing heavily Janet rose to see what the man wanted; her staff was already avoiding interacting with him while she was around. They learned the hard way he was a very difficult patient, even worse than Jack O’Neill they claimed.
Janet walked out of her office and over to the corner bed that was screened off to transform it into a mini room. Rodney insisted upon having a TV so he could watch his collection of DVDs. There were also two laptop computers set up on either side of him, so he could perfect the many theories he claimed, along with a mini fridge for his snacks.
Walking over to the bed she stood arms crossed, “What do you need now Rodney?”
“Ah…Dr Fraiser…just the person I needed to see,” replied Rodney.
Janet waited, ‘What in the world could he want?’ she thought.
“I need for you to pass a message on to Colonel Carter, tell her I’ve discovered a flaw in her latest calculations on the use of naquada to recharge the ZPM’s,” he said, pronouncing the z as zed, “oh and I need some more snacks for my fridge.”
Janet sighed, “Rodney, I’ll let the colonel know about your new information but I refuse to play your gopher for anything else.”
“Well, without my snacks I’ll get hypoglycemic,” he whined.
“Good thing you’re in the infirmary then,“ Janet quipped as she turned to leave the man to figure out another way to get his snacks.
Janet went back to her office, removing her lab coat she grabbed her purse and jacket, it was time to track down Sam and see what plans they were making for dinner. Leaving the infirmary, she walked into the elevator and rode it down to the lab levels. Upon reaching Sam’s lab, she discovered the door closed and a note with her name on it. Pulling the taped note down she read…Hey Jan…I’m in the commissary with Cam and Vala…meet me there.
Crumpling the note up she turned to go back to the elevator, going back up a few levels she exited and soon walked into the commissary where she saw Sam sitting at a table in the corner with Cameron and Vala, the three were clustered close together as if they were discussing something they didn’t want to be overheard.
Janet walked up and letting her purse fall with a thud on the table she said, “What ever you’re planning…I want in on it.”
Three innocent faces turned to look at her; well Vala was looking not so innocent being unable to hide her grin.
“I have no clue what you’re talking about Janet, “ Sam said nonchalantly.
“Me neither Doc,” Cameron’s replied.
Vala just grinned wider.
“Oh come on,” Janet said as she sat down, “it’s two days before Halloween and Rodney McKay is on Earth; I know you two…” she pointed at Sam and Cam, “are planning another prank. Samantha Carter I know you to well …don’t try and fool me.”
Sam sighed, Cameron gave her a look and shook his head…no. She kicked him under the table and glared back at him. As he was rubbing his kicked shin Sam began speaking.
“Alright…we are planning another prank on him,” she admitted to her partner, “Why do you want to be in on it?”
“Because…he’s been in my infirmary for four days and has alienated every member of my staff; not to mention treating me like errand boy. I’m surprised someone on Atlantis hasn’t caused him physical harm before this. I can see why you’ve been avoiding the infirmary now Sam. That man is infuriating and he stepped on my last nerve today,” Janet informed the group.
Sam rubbed her hand up and down Janet’s back, “Sorry I haven’t been by to see you, but every time I get around him I swear my blood pressure sky rockets and I just want to twist his head off. I mean come on, I’m smart but I don’t rub it in people’s faces like he does,” she said to her partner.
“Believe me if you acted anything like him, you’d be a single woman in a heartbeat, “ Janet replied grinning.
Sam crinkled her nose and stuck out her tongue in reply to Janet’s grin.
“So…what’s the plan folks?” asked Janet
“Well…since you’re going to be helping this will go a whole lot smoother now,” Cameron commented as he began to outline their idea.
The four conspirators moved in closer together as he explained the prank; occasionally Sam or Vala would throw in another twist while Janet listened trying not to laugh.
*****************
Two days later, All Hallows Eve was upon them. The four met in Sam’s lab to go over everything one more time.
“Okay…Janet…Vala…you’re in charge of readying the package, while Cam and myself will be delivering it,” Sam said grinning, “We’ll give you a call on the radio when we’re ready to transport.”
“What if we finish before you’re ready?” asked Vala.
“Well that’s why having Janet help was so great, the sedative she’s going to give should keep him out for several hours…right?” Sam said looking at Janet.
“Oh yeah…he’ll sleep like a baby with a full tummy,” Janet assured her with a grin.
“Okay team…Operation Punk McKay is a go,” Cam said laughing and they all left to carry out the prank.
The infirmary was empty except for Rodney; there were advantages to being CMO after all, having made sure her staff was busy elsewhere. Janet and Vala walked into the infirmary, Vala making a beeline for Rodney’s corner; Janet heading for dispensary. While Vala made small talk with the scientist, Janet readied the sedative. Once the shot was ready, she walked over to the corner.
“Why yes…it was me that discovered a way to save Teal’c from being trapped in the wormhole stream,” commented Rodney as Janet walked up.
Janet held her tongue; it was Sam who discovered a way to rescue Teal’c, not this idiot. While Rodney babbled on with Vala just smiling and oohing at his comments Janet added the sedative into the IV controlling his meds.
“What was that?” he asked when noticing her actions.
“Oh just some antibiotics, don’t want any secondary infections happening now do we,” commented Janet.
“Oh… okay,” he replied and continued with his tall tale.
Vala mouthed…”How long?”, when Rodney wasn’t looking.
Janet stood behind the man, holding up five fingers she counted down, five…four...three...two...one; when she reached one Rodney suddenly went silent, his eyes glassed over and he fell back into the bed.
“Wow…that was fast,” Vala said with grin. Hopping up she ran to Janet’s office to get the supplies they needed. Returning she set the items on a nearby table and began helping Janet to strip the clothing from the victim.
“Are you sure that stuff will wash off?” Janet asked as Vala began lathering on the liquid.
“Oh quite sure, I tested it on Daniel before he left for that conference,” she remarked with a smile, “it’s even edible…see,” she dipped a finger in the container bringing it up for Janet to taste.
“Oh… that’s good; you’re going to have to tell me where you found this, “ Janet replied grinning.
The two women giggled at each other and then began finishing their part of the prank.
Meanwhile, Sam and Cameron were busy sneaking aboard the Daedalus. Sure, they just could have walked right on board, but where was the fun in that. Sam made sure their entrance into the docking area wouldn’t show up in the security logs by hacking into the base computer. Once in they debated on whether or not to zat the guards but then decided that was going overboard. Therefore, they stood behind some cargo crates throwing pebbles picked up from outside at the distant wall. The pebbles made resounding clangs in the docking bay causing the guards to venture over to discover the cause. When this happened, they snuck aboard.
Not exactly sure if all personnel where gone they carefully made their way to the bridge. While Cam kept a watch out for any crew, Sam began entering information into the transport console.
“Okay I’ve located his transponder in the infirmary…now, what are the co-ordinates for his destination?” she asked Cam as he came to stand next to her.
Pulling out a piece of paper he handed it to her, “This is what my buddy sent me; I made sure he plotted it out just right. Don’t want Rodney to end up in a tree or something; this should put him smack in the middle of a clearing,” he assured her.
Sam typed in the destination, “Alright…we’re ready on this end, call and see if they have the package ready,” she said with a giggle.
“Mama Bear this is Pappa Bear do you read me?” Cam said keying his radio.
“Mama Bear here Pappa Bear…over,” came the tinny reply on the radio.
“Is the package ready for delivery…over,” he asked.
“Package ready and waiting Pappa Bear…tell Goldilocks transport when ready…over,” was the response.
Sam nodded and Cam said, “Transporting the package now…stand clear Mamma Bear…over.”
“Mama Bear and Baby Bear clear…over” the voice said.
Sam pushed several buttons activating the console, a moment later she checked for the transponder signal; finding it in the exact spot given to her by Cam, she gave him a thumbs up.
“Pappa Bear to Mama Bear and Baby Bear…the package is delivered…standby for arrivals… over,” Cam said into the radio.
“Coast is clear, awaiting your arrival…Mama Bear over and out,” the voice on the other radio said.
Sam quickly entered new co-ordinates, while also making sure the logs wouldn’t show the activity after they left. Walking away from the console she and Cameron waited in the front area of the bridge where they were enveloped in the transport beam, disappearing they reappeared in the SGC infirmary.
“Everything go smooth on this end?” Sam asked.
“Smooth as glass,” Janet remarked, “they shouldn’t even know he’s missing since my staff refuses to go near his bed.”
“Well all that’s left to do now is wait,” Vala commented.
“Ladies how about I treat you to a nice steak dinner,” Cam said with a big smile on his face.
“That sounds perfect,” replied Sam.
The four pranksters walked out of the infirmary, heading out to enjoy the rest of the evening.
********************
The next day during the morning briefing, the four acted as usual. Janet was in the middle of giving General Landry updates on injured personnel when Walter came into the room. He walked over to the General, leaning down he whispered something in Landry’s ear.
“Excuse me folks, I have to take an important phone call,” Landry said as he rose and disappeared into his office.
Looks were shared as he left the table; they all were trying very hard to keep straight faces as he soon reappeared in his office door.
“Okay…does somebody want to explain to me how Rodney McKay ended up in the middle of a orange tree grove in Florida…naked, painted blue and orange with a sign saying Go Gators attached to his chest?” Landry asked.
No one said a word.
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